Journal Entry #1

Who am I if I’m not your wife? That was my job… I loved my job. I look at our children and I don’t want to be afraid of what will become of us but I am.

There is a void, an emptiness in my heart. It constricts my ability to think and even breath. I’m sitting here in the quiet of the night waiting for you to come through the door. I’m sorry I wasn’t enough. I’m sorry you couldn’t love me more then your addictions.

I can close my eyes and feel your kiss. Sometimes I want to just keep my eyes closed forever. This pain in my heart is so overwhelming. I would have followed you anywhere. I never needed you to be perfect I just wanted your time, your love, the heart of who I thought you were.

How did I not see this happening. How could you look at me and lie over and over again. I just want my family back… Lord please put this back together.


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  1. I have always admired you and your strength and your weakness. You always seemed to have it all and all together at that. You are amazing and powerful. I couldn’t be happier to call you my friend. I am proud of you, you have always been enough!

    love you friend